Today I am linking up with Nicole‘s Listable Life and listing 5 things I wish I had the guts to do. They are, in no particular order:
1. Take a cruise I know what you’re thinking: what part of going on a cruise requires guts? Well, you see I am one of those people that gets horribly motion sick. On boats, planes, in cars . . . I always get sick. I have to take Dramamine to fly any distance or sail any further than on the ferry between Bainbridge and Seattle or when driving for longer than an hour – especially if driving in the mountains. However, my motion sickness affliction has gotten better as I’ve gotten older and there are so many new medicines I can take. Someone is always recommending something to me when I mention why I can’t take a cruise. I just wish I had the balls to go for it and see if I could actually survive a cruise without puking. I’m afraid I’ll feel horrible for most, if not all of the trip. And if you have never suffered from seasickness let me just say, it’s just about the worst feeling in the world.
2. Take a class in something that is out of my comfort zone Improv, acting, painting or photography. Something creative that doesn’t have anything to do with writing. But every time I think about taking such a class (and there have been a couple times recently), I hear a voice in my head saying, “You can’t do that! You will sputter and freeze and turn 30 shades of red! If you try to paint or create something it will turn out to be crap and everyone will think you suck.” I wish I had the balls to shut that voice down. Tell her to fuck off.
3. Vlog I have been talking about putting videos on my blog for at least a year now. The (one-sided) conversation always goes like this: “I’m going to start making videos for my blog. My stories are so funny, but what makes them so funny is the funny way I tell them and my voice inflections. I’m totally going to do that! Maybe I’ll start a vlog series or something.” And then? I don’t. I will read up on how to vlog; go to a presentation on vlogging at blog conferences. And then, I do nothing. I’m afraid I won’t really come across that funny or be as natural in front of the camera as I am when I’m just speaking to friends. Also? I’m sooooo lazy. I don’t want to have to figure out the lighting and the camera crap and put on make up and brush my hair. Lord, that sounded really bad. I should just get my shit together and get on this. I totally would if I weren’t so afraid I’ll look an ass.
4. Cancel cable I have been talking and thinking about this a lot lately. The cable bill is out of control! Not to mention my TV line up. I watch too much, y’all. But the thought of going without Mad Men, The Walking Dead, Big Brother, The Good Wife, etc, etc, etc gives me the shakes. I know, I know! I can stream shows on Netflix or Redu or Hulu or all 3! And still won’t be paying anywhere near what I am for cable. I just don’t know. I’m scared, you guys. I wish I had the guts to pull the plug on Comcast. Anyone out there watch a lot of TV like me and successfully pull the plug on cable?
5. Live in a foreign Country Big Daddy has wanted to do this for years. Awhile ago he had a serious bug up his ass to move us all to New Zealand. I just absolutely flat out refuse. I have a litany of reasons, but really they could all easily be shot down. I’m sure it would be an amazing experience. Not only for me, but for the girls. And I know from leaving San Diego for New York City, what it can do for you to get a new perspective and broaden your horizons. I can’t imagine the benefits of submerging yourself in another country’s culture. But, I’m scared. Scared of starting over with making friends; finding work; how it will effect the kids. Maybe when they are all grown Big Daddy and I can retire to Paris.
What do you wish you had the guts to do?
Let me just start right off by saying I am not a fan of the science fair. And this year it is the bane of my existence. Here’s the thing: I don’t enjoy participating in this type of thing. I never did as a student (I don’t ever remember a science fair at any school I attended, but I’m sure there had to have been one. This just demonstrates my level of interest in this crap), and I certainly don’t dig it now, as a parent.
So last year when they expressed an interest when the announcement was made at school, I just hung back and followed their lead. I neither encouraged nor discouraged. They decided it was too much work and not enough fun and didn’t participate. Yay! But then, the day of the science fair they were bummed out. And of course, blamed me. In order to avoid that sort of meltdown and the guilt I felt for not wanting to do the work myself, I encouraged them to do a project this year. And encouraged Big Daddy to handle everything.
Well, they were all gung ho to pick a topic and get some books at the library, but when it came to the actual work, not so much. Now, possibly this is where I am a bad parent, or I should have handled this differently. But you see, we are not those parents that want to do a lot of the work for our kid’s school projects. Yes, a family project is an option and I see nothing wrong with that at all. We do not take this stance because we believe it is better for the kids to do all the work. No, we take this stance because we don’t want to do jack shit. We’ll drive you to the library, help you to look up your research online, explain how to write a report in your own words (as opposed to cutting and pasting off the internet) and we’ll tell you how rockin your project is. But that’s all.
Also? One kid has softball practice twice a week and a game once a week. There is homework and Daisy meetings. Soccer and a 3rd sister to contend with for time/attention. So when the girls said they didn’t want to do a project this year, we sat them down, made sure this was their final decision and that there wouldn’t be any meltdowns. Then we breathed a sigh of relief.
Fast forward a week, they’ve been sucked into doing a project with a friend. With one week until the deadline. A week of board meetings for me, softball practice and games and soccer. It’s been a bit of a source of stress, to say the least. But today is the day projects are due, so I guess the worst is behind me.
Except I just know they are going to get to school, see those kick-ass projects that the parents worked on and bitch at me for not doing that.
So I’m watching the Today Show this morning, when they have a segment on Stranger Danger (giant eye roll. What a dumb phrase). You know the drill. We’ve seen these before on every news magazine TV show. They hire actors to ask kids to help them look for their puppy or to knock on the kids’ door when the parents aren’t home. Then the parents are shocked when the kids skip off with the actors and open the door for them.
The Today Show got really creative and had a man in an ice cream truck roll up on 3 boys and offer free ice cream. The ice cream man then told the boys they could see the inside of the ice cream truck. And much to the surprise of the boys’ mothers who were watching, they all jumped at the opportunity.
Really? Moms, you are shocked by this? Because you have told your children many, many times not to talk to strangers? To never go anywhere with a stranger? To never open the door to a stranger? How about a stranger with a badge? Yes, that was the scenario the Today producers set up. Who wouldn’t open the fucking door for a man with a badge?! How many home invasions take place because some douche pretended to be the UPS man? Grown-ass adults opened the door for those thugs!
How many adult women are lured into danger by a handsome stranger? Shit happens people. We are lured in. We trust. Now, of course I hope most of us adults have some common sense and would avoid some of these traps. But sometimes you just can’t blame the victim.
And our kids? Well, I don’t know what to tell you. I tell my girls on a regular basis to never go anywhere with a stranger, not to let anyone in the house when I’m not home – even someone they know. Etc, etc, etc. But, I know with every fiber of my being that if the ice cream man offered them free ice cream and a tour of the inside of the truck, they’d take that offer in a heart beat. And if some man was looking for his puppy in the park? They’d want to help him.
So TV producers everywhere: I don’t need to see another segment on Stranger Danger. I get it. My kids don’t get it. I’ll keep a close eye on them. And you know what else I’ll do? I will remember that most children who are molested are abused by someone they know. This whole stranger danger thing just isn’t realistic. Does it happen, yes? About as often as someone wins the lottery. So while I will not stop telling my kids to be weary of people they do not know, I’m not going to worry about the fact that they will most likely let the tool with the fake badge in the door.
photo credit
I have a love-hate relationship with my kids sleeping in my bed. They love it, I hate it. I’m kidding. I mostly love it. But then I don’t. Here’s the thing: sometimes they get into the bed and just sleep. No moving around, or squirming or fighting over who gets to be next to Mama. They just snuggle up and sleep. And that? Well, I love that. Their sweet, warm bodies cuddled up with us. But there are other nights when they are kicking the covers off; ramming their knees are into my back and putting their elbows in my eye; and someone is having a bad dream.
They don’t come into the bed in the middle of the night every night. And it’s not always all of them. Sometimes it’s one other times it’s two and on occasion all 3 have climbed into our bed somewhere between midnight and 4am. Sometimes I don’t even know one of them is in the bed until I wake up in the morning. So, see? It’s not all bad.
But Zeta is just too damn big! The girl is closing in on 9 years old and she’s tall for her age. She has long limbs and likes to sleep on a diagonal. And to sleep with her arms behind her head, which results in her elbow in my eye. If Zeta is already in the bed when Nita arrives, she will make a noise that sounds like a kitten crying and complain until she can get next to me. Then Zeta will complain that Nita always gets her way and it’s not fair. Then I will yell at them to zip it and go to sleep!
Jemima is really the best one to sleep with, so of course comes to our bed the least. She gets right in, burrows down under the comforter and goes right to sleep. And does not move until morning. She will even sleep through the other two fighting over who gets to be next to me. Plus, she’s tiny and compact. She doesn’t take up much space and she keeps all her limbs curled under her.
I do have to admit that there are times when all five of us are in the bed, and my heart is bursting with love. How lucky am I to have three amazing kids and a great husband? And a king size bed? Pretty damn lucky! Those times are usually on the weekend.
For my birthday I received a couple gifts that have been life-changing. And because I am always interested in what things other people are digging on, I thought I’d share. I am in no way being compensated for this post. Opinions and text are mine alone and no one sponsored me (If one of these companies should stumble upon this review however, and feel compelled to send me some free stuff, I wouldn’t say no).
Kiehl’s Argan Dry Oil The bff gave this to me. Along with Kiehl’s Lavender Foaming Relaxing Bath with Sea Salts and Aloe. which is incredible as well. But not life-changing. This post is dedicated to life-changing gifts. The argan dry oil is the bomb, y’all! OMG. I have long been a fan of Neutrogena’s mineral oil. But it’s a bit greasy and you have to wait for it to dry or soak into your skin. Because of that I have never used it regularly. Argan dry oil leaves no greasy residue. It instantly soaks into your skin, leaving it soft and silky (I know! Such a ‘line’ but really, it does!). Also? You can put it on your hair! People this is revolutionary for me. I have frizzy hair, even after using a flat iron. I have used every single (within my price range) anti-frizz hair product on the market. None of them work for me. They either do nothing or they make my hair look dirty. This? This life-changing Aragan Dry Oil? It smooths my hair without making it look like it hasn’t been washed in 3 days. Now, it’s not a miracle oil. I still have *some* frizz, but it’s damn close to a miracle.
Amazon Kindle Lighted Cover This was a gift from Big Daddy. And in many ways, it’s a gift for him. You see I’m always up reading when he is trying to sleep. I’m not that nice and I also get engrossed in books, so I refuse to turn off the light while he’s trying to sleep. What? He’s asleep. Trust me. But beyond making it easier for Big Daddy to get to sleep, it makes reading so much easier for me! You know what I was doing before this wonderful and thoughtful gift was given to me? I not only had the light on, but I would put my iphone on my chest and use the flashlight app. Yeah. I also clipped a regular book light to it, but that didn’t really work. Now? Well now I have this sleek leather case that protects the kindle and lights up! The super cool thing about it is that the light runs on the charge of your kindle. It never burns out, so never has to be replaced. Cool, huh? And when you don’t need the light, it is tucked into the cover. Yes, life-changing.
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