So there I am on Facebook (as per usual), when I see that an old friend from high school is sharing some photos from back in the day. And there is one that reminds me of a story from all those years ago.
When I was a senior in high school, there was a boy in my class who had the hots for me. He didn’t have a crush on me or want to date me. He wanted to fuck me. And he made this known to me with offers of “doing it in his van in the parking lot during lunch.” Enticing, no?
He even had a mutual friend go to bat for him. And she was relentless. She’d sit behind me in class (who remembers which subject? It was 25 years ago), lean across her little student desk and whisper things in my ear like, “Come on, Trish. He’s really hot!” and “He’ll do you doggie style.That’s his favorite.”
This just cracked me up. I’d tell her I wasn’t interested; I had a boyfriend; fucking some dude I barely knew in his van at lunch wasn’t really something on my bucket list and to just lay off.
Finally, one day she says to me, out of what I believe to be desperation, “Come on! You ever do it with a long-hair?!”
While that didn’t convince me to give this kid some action, it did make me laugh. And it’s a line I’ve never forgotten. Seeing the picture this week brought it all back.
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For his sake I hope he was able to get some better lines. Because nothing says romance like getting right to the point, huh? Is he the guy with the bad spiral perm or the David Lee Roth wannabe?
thedoseofreality recently posted..Nora Ephron Made Me Think
David Lee Roth wannabe.
Like, omg– I can’t believe your Hanes cotton briefs didn’t just drop right off because he sounds like a real keeper. Also, I see more of a David Coverdale thing happening and just think– you *could* have been in a Whitesnake video if you weren’t such a prude! Gawd! You coulda been Tawny Kitaen! Fuck!
RachRiot recently posted..Housewife Hoedown!
Totally. I completely blew it. For the record, I didn’t wear underwear back then. Didn’t want VPL and thongs weren’t invented yet.
Damn, you blew it girl. He just HAD to have had better hair than most of the chicks in your class. And a van????? Whew, now that is one classy dude!!! Stopping by from Kelly’s Break Room.
I graduated in ’92 and seeing this picture makes me THANK GOD that by the time I was in high school, boys mostly had short hair. Because that picture is just frightening. Ewwwwwww. Doggie style at lunch. In a van, no less. You could have had it all, baby! Boy did you blow it!
sparkling74 recently posted..I’m In the Money….
There were plenty of chicks in the 80′s who thought that Bon Jovi long hair was H.O.T. I was not one of them. I’ve always found short hair on a man to be very sexy. But yeah, maybe I’d have a better story to tell today had I taken him up on that hobo over to get bent over in his van in the parking lot.
Oh my, this is a lesson in how NOT to pick someone up!
Just visiting from SITS
Wow. Just wow. And too funny.
Happy Sharefest!
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